Can you help me…? | the grammar exchange

quote:

Where I live, when someone asks “can you help me do the math problems”, it means he will not be helping in doing the math problems.

Hello, Ms. Tan,

If I’m not mistaken, you are explaining the English meaning of a sentence in your native language, or some other non-English language. When you say whatever “Can you help me do the math problems?” translates to in that language, you get the meaning you describe. Please let me know if I’m mistaken.

quote:

I think the correct request should be “Can you do the math problems for me?”

Well, if I wanted you to do my math problems for me, I could certainly ask you, “Can you do the math problems for me?,” or “Would you be willing to do the math problems for me?” But I don’t know how the translations of those English sentences would sound, or be received, in your native language, or whatever language you seem to want to translate them into.

Even in English, the sentence “Can you do the math problems for me?” would likely not be well received by the listener. It’s like asking, “Will you do my homework for me?” The purpose of solving math problems is to build skill and knowledge in mathematics. For someone to do someone else’s homework problems for him or her is to do that person a disservice.

If a native speaker were clever, he would not come right out and say, “Can you do the math problems for me?” He would not want his interlocutor to think he was a poor student or a cheater. A softer, more polite, and less risky way to ask the question is: “Can/could you show me how to do the math problems?”

quote:

Also, “Can you help me carry the chairs?” means the other party has to carry the chairs himself. The requester does nothing.

Your question touches upon sociolinguistic matters, Ms. Tan. I don’t know what the concept of help is in your culture, or how it might differ from our general concept of help in the U.S.; so I really can’t say whether any misuse of terms is happening. But I can tell you that I wouldn’t ask someone “Can you help me carry the chairs?” if I weren’t planning on doing any lifting myself. And I probably wouldn’t say, “Can you carry the chairs for me?” either. I might say, “Would you do me a big favor and carry these chairs?”

Hello, Ms. Tan,If I’m not mistaken, you are explaining the English meaning of a sentence in your native language, or some other non-English language. When you say whatever “Can you help me do the math problems?” translates to in that language, you get the meaning you describe. Please let me know if I’m mistaken.Well, if I wanted you to do my math problems for me, I could certainly ask you, “Can you do the math problems for me?,” or “Would you be willing to do the math problems for me?” But I don’t know how the translations of those English sentences would sound, or be received, in your native language, or whatever language you seem to want to translate them into.Even in English, the sentence “Can you do the math problems for me?” would likely not be well received by the listener. It’s like asking, “Will you do my homework for me?” The purpose of solving math problems is to build skill and knowledge in mathematics. For someone to do someone else’s homework problems for him or her is to do that person a disservice.If a native speaker were clever, he would not come right out and say, “Can you do the math problems for me?” He would not want his interlocutor to think he was a poor student or a cheater. A softer, more polite, and less risky way to ask the question is: “Can/could you show me how to do the math problems?”Your question touches upon sociolinguistic matters, Ms. Tan. I don’t know what the concept of help is in your culture, or how it might differ from our general concept of help in the U.S.; so I really can’t say whether any misuse of terms is happening. But I can tell you that I wouldn’t ask someone “Can you help me carry the chairs?” if I weren’t planning on doing any lifting myself. And I probably wouldn’t say, “Can you carry the chairs for me?” either. I might say, “Would you do me a big favor and carry these chairs?”